Personally, I had four conversations — three with my boss and one with HR, and it was last left that my boss would be talking with HR.
Seeing as it has been 3 months since that last conversation I'm afraid with the extent of this situation that I'm entering into the nag classification. What should I do now?
— Andrea, Seattle
Thanks for writing in. Your situation sounds frustrating, and I can understand how you would feel concerned about bringing up a raise for the fifth time.
You don't mention how you made your case for a raise, or what the response has been — have your boss and HR have been generally supportive but distracted, or perhaps indifferent or even unsupportive?
Let's assume you have a strong case to make for yourself. This means you're a high performer and you've let them know in no uncertain terms that you are asking for a raise. Hopefully you've even have done some benchmarking to make sure you're asking for the market rate.
Ask yourself this: at this point, if they gave you the raise — no questions asked — would you be satisfied?
If you would be, it's worth having a respectful but explicit conversation about your needs. If you're at all uncertain that they are crystal clear on your specific request, I would encourage you to try one more time and be as explicit as possible: based on your track record of performance, you're looking for a raise of X% in Y timeframe.
If you're already so frustrated that you can't imagine having that conversation, don't waste your time agonizing over what to say, and put your energy into finding a role that's a better fit.
— Alexandra Dickinson
CEO + founder
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